For cloudy days, colored umbrellas. The truth is that sometimes we don’t really know why, but a gray day is followed by a darker one, and then another, until a strange season of bad weather is concatenated where it is very difficult to raise your head.
It is normal. Believe it or not, you are not the only person who feels discomfort or who perceives that nothing is going well at times.
We all go through those periods of difficulty or personal anguish in which, no matter how high the sun is, it does not seem to shine for us.
Sometimes it is not even necessary that “something bad” happened. It is rather a slow, deep apathy and an uncomfortable malaise that makes us lose heart and even hope.
For those days, don’t hesitate: colored umbrellas. They are invisible shields that will allow us to protect ourselves from toxic people, negative thoughts, fears and worries. We encourage you to open them every day. We explain how.
Our emotional umbrellas and the wind of happiness
Emotional umbrellas are insurmountable barriers that protect our self-esteem and that, in turn, give color to those somewhat gray, somewhat muted emotions.
One thing to keep in mind is that we all have the right to have our black days. Embracing our demons and knowing our fears is undoubtedly therapeutic: it allows us to know ourselves better.
Now, after having hit rock bottom, getting up is an obligation, and we will do so driven by renewed forces, with more intense illusions. Because remember: the day you wake up without an illusion is a wasted day.
Martin Seligman is a famous psychologist who represents this very interesting current of positive psychology. It is undoubtedly curious to analyze his professional career, since for a time he was a benchmark in the area of depression, coining terms as important as learned helplessness.
Now, little by little he realized that most areas of psychology were oriented to the field of illness or those more complex dimensions related to negative emotions.
Until now, no one had bothered to teach us to “be happy”, to unfold our colored umbrellas to let ourselves be carried away by the wind of happiness, free from dark storms.
Since then, thanks to books like Authentic Happiness or Learned Optimism, he has offered us wonderful strategies to be a little more skillful when it comes to promoting this well-being, this vital energy based on self-improvement and joy.
We now explain what are the 5 steps according to Seligman to build our happiness, to open those colored umbrellas. The technique is called “PERMA” and corresponds to each of these keys.
Colored Umbrellas: P ( Positive Emotions ) Positive Emotions
The more positive emotions, the more happiness. It seems, without a doubt, a too obvious rule, but… How to achieve it?
- Change your thinking and you will create a new emotion.
- Start with the smallest things, the most basic. Something as basic as getting out of bed thinking that “today is going to be a good day” can be very appropriate.
- Other proposals would be, for example, “I am not going to let what this person says or does affect me” or “today I am going to take care of myself and prioritize myself” .
E ( Engagement ) Involvement
In this key, Martin Seligman proposes the following: to be able to get involved in a positive way in each day-to-day activity.
Try to do it, even if your tasks are routine and somewhat boring, try to see those obligations with another color, with another perspective.
R ( Relationship ) Relations
Our day-to-day relationships can be, on the one hand, the focus of greatest happiness or, on the contrary, what brings us more headaches.
Open your colored umbrella once again to keep yourself protected from those who want to bring you worries, problems or anguish. Put them away. Then, take by your hand those that really enrich your life, that give you light and happiness.
M ( Meaning ) Meaning
This dimension is somewhat more complex but easy to understand. It is about getting involved in something that offers us meaning, value, and utility.
Feeling useful as well as comfortable and excited about certain projects or people can make our well-being flourish every day.
Look for what motivates you, that excites you, that makes you feel good about yourself as well as useful.
A ( Accomplishment ) Achievement
Feeling that we are capable of achieving our goals, that we are skillful, that our efforts have rewards, configure those achievements that also offer us happiness.
The key is to be constant, not to lose heart or hope, to dance every day of our lives with those colored umbrellas that protect us from cloudy days.
Note: Here are tips that may not be helpful. If you need professional help, we recommend consulting a psychologist.